So, You Want to Be a Vampire? is the 6th episode of season 1 of Ugly Americans.
Mark Lilly meets a woman (later revealed to be Grimes' daughter) who wants to become a vampire like her boyfriend (in a parody of the Twilight series). Francis Grimes and his crew have to take anger management classes under the supervision of Leonard Powers, who ends up forgetting about the instruction and hunts vampires with the police. Meanwhile, the people of the city, including Francis Grimes, are being afflicted by a strange illness called "Mad Larry Disease", a communicable disease which transforms the residents of New York City into Larry King clones.